Wanna know something gross about me?
I know more about what others want for themselves then I know about what I want for me.
It's a flaw and it has to do with what I've been figuring out over the last couple of years. Who are you? I know it's such a tough fucking question.
Looking back I think my first dreams involved having a loving family. I think I want to be a part of a loving family. I got that. I'm a loving father.
It's hard not to look back and say that I didn't have a good father or any good loving siblings, but I guess you can't.
What do I want beyond the family.
Love, lust passion...
So how do I turn my weakness into a strength?
I do what others want to please them. I'd like to do what I want to please me.
Becoming me will mean I have to do what I want. I want to be perfect. Or get as close as I can to perfection.
I want to focus on my body but that immediately gets me thinking that I'm doing it to get attention from others.
this is a grossly huge and emotional topic. I'm sure I'll be back to enjoy more of this shit soon.
No comments:
Post a Comment